Today I sat in my living room, closed my eyes and spoke words of life until my mind was forced to agree. Only then was I able to let go and actually start believing what was being spoken.
I always know when my mind has given up trying to control me. I lose a sense of where I am and I feel myself rising up, my body becomes heavy and I know I am finally present.
My emotions, thoughts, whereabouts, circumstances, and fears no longer exist, and I am free to be the real Jodie and talk to God in His language. (Our language)
It’s incredible and feels so natural. I find out so much about this exact moment – that I would usually just let pass me by while I worry about future moments or even past moments.
Once I opened my eyes I realised that I have being using my negative thinking to protect myself.
If I think negative it will hurt less when it actually happens.
If I think negative I won’t step into something I know is wrong.
If I think negative I will figure it all out and never be deceived again.
These are the stories I have been consciously and subconsciously telling myself.
What would happen if I chose to just think positive about everything?
Negative things would still happen, but only when they happened in reality rather than every single hour of everyday in my mind.
My mind would learn a new route and automatically start seeing the best in everything rather than using the same route it has used for so long. (Which has clearly not got me very far)
I could let go of my attempt at the control of outcomes and take more risks without fear.
I could learn to love myself and others without trembling at the thought of rejection and abandonment (after all I’ve survived it before I can survive it again)
I will attract more of the right things into my life and be attracted to better energy.
I was not born to be anxious, fragile, and fearful. I was not born to just be peaceful by myself, for myself and within myself … I have a responsibility to find out exactly who I am and use who I am to impact those around me.
I am sensitive but strong
I am giving but wise
I sob my heart out when it hurts, but I also laugh from the soul when I am free.
I love with all my heart, and I am also loved intensely.
I am sassy, but I am also very understanding and forgiving.
I am very aware of the fact that life’s circumstances can bring happy moments, but can not give me the peace and joy I crave so much. This is why I am so open about my spirituality, my security in God, and my gratitude for being woken up to this from such a young age.
Here’s to being blessed with today … and a hope for tomorrow