Being Mum…

After a day of…

“No we are not going to church I have too much housework to do, get out the house we are late, go back in the house you have forgotten your swimming kit, what are you wearing? Why don’t you listen, use your brain, you are driving me crazy ” etc…

I have only just realised my son has not had much to say today, and what he has said has been positive…

“Wow, mummy I know we are rushing but remember when we used to walk to swimming. Then we all prayed for you to have a car and now you we have one”

“Today is a lovely day”

“You look so nice mummy”

I know you don’t like what I’m wearing, but I think I look cool”

“3 days till I am 7 and I get to spend the day with mum and dad together”

“Was that Nana on the phone? I hope she is ok”

I find it quite heartbreaking that none of those comments registered in my mind until now. I have been all caught up in my own toxic (me,me,me) thoughts. Reacting to my frustration at not being who I should by shutting up, and pushing aside the one small person who only ever reminds me of love in its purest form.

I actually woke him up an hour after he fell asleep to tell him I love him and I’m sorry for being so sad today…

“I forgive you mummy”